For as long as I could remember, I have always had the ability to sense people's thoughts and emotions. I wasn't aware I was using that ability everyday as a child to protect myself. Growing up in an unstable environment where I witnessed and experienced abuse, my hypersensitivity allowed me to read the room so I could ensure my own safety.
In the Asian culture, there's an expectation to uphold the image of a perfect family, regardless of what really happens behind closed doors. This led me to suppressing the abuse and pretending everything was fine, to the point where I started to believe it myself. Deep down inside though, I knew I was far from fine.
My mom noticed how musically inclined I was as a kid and decided to nurture it. Somehow, even though we were poor, I got put into private piano lessons. Classical music became my escape. It was also where I learned how to feel spirit through music.
Music came easy to me. I was able to skip grades and advanced myself in only a few short years. There was immense pressure from my parents to finish all the grades and get my teacher's license as fast as possible because of money issues. Eventually, I couldn't handle the pressure and unrealistic expectations anymore so quit. I then found something new to soothe the pain — boys.
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